


You Mess With Them, You Mess With Me

by Anglachel54



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Bilbo Remains In Erebor, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, BAMF Bilbo, Epic Friendship, Everyone Needs A Hug, Gen, Harassment, Minor Violence, Post!BotFA, Protective Bilbo, Some Swearing, Threats
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-25
Updated: 2015-02-25
Packaged: 2018-03-15 04:50:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3434204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anglachel54/pseuds/Anglachel54
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Erebor was retaken, the company of Thorin Oakenshield was settled on the idea of peace after the battle- How wrong they were. As dwarves returned back to the Lonely Mountain, our favourite dwarves are faced with months of death threats, stalking and harassment. </p><p>Our story starts with Bilbo's re-entrance into Erebor and how he took care of the problem.<br/>{AU, BAMF!Protective!Bilbo} (Oneshot)</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Mess With Them, You Mess With Me

**Author's Note:**

> Based off one of the types of love from the Ancient Greeks; 'Storge' or the kind of family/friendship love. Storge is the love that parents naturally feel for their children; the love that members of the family have for each other; or the love that friends feel for each other....Storge love is unconditional, accepts flaws or faults and ultimately drives you to forgive. It’s committed, sacrificial and makes you feel secure, comfortable and safe.
> 
> Notes for the story:  
> -So the whole harassment/stalking is felt mostly by Ori (I don't know why peeps would wanna bother him, he's too adorable) and things may have escalated to the point where they may have tried to make unwanted advances towards Ori or perhaps cut off one of his braids?  
> -The whole company was targeted. The older dwarves were harassed - perhaps death threats/notes, stalking  
> -It's gotten to the point where the 'criminals' get too careless and are caught (thanks to the efforts of Guardsman!Dwalin and Spymaster!Nori) and they are being dealt with  
> -Our story begins with Bilbo entering the scene, having just arrived with Gandalf from the Shire.

Bilbo took one glance at Ori's tear streaked face, roving over all the haggard forms of his friends and turned slowly to the smirking dwarrows being restrained by Dwalin, Bifur and Bofur.  
  
The look of complete rage encompassed the normally smiling hobbit’s face and was replaced by a cold green fire as he stalked towards them. He gestured to Dwalin to let the biggest one go which he did reluctantly.  
  
  
"And what are you going to do, Halfling?" The leader sneered.  
  
  
A smirk was all he saw before a swift knee to the stomach had him crouching in pain, and then a fierce uppercut to the face soon had red blooming everywhere as the audible crunch of a broken nose being broken under impact. The dwarf yelped out in pain but was cut off when he was suddenly tripped and then pressed against the floor by the neck as Bilbo stared down at him.  
  
  
"Do you know who I am?"  
  
  
The growled question had the dwarrow quiver in fear as he stared into the eyes of what most likely could be his death.  
  
  
"B-Bil," the dwarf choked out.  
  
  
"My name is Bilbo Baggins." The hobbit interrupted, his voice echoing through the halls and let go of the dwarrow’s neck - only to draw him up by his lapels, "And I am going to teach you and your little bitch friends a lesson. One you shall never forget."  
  
He tossed the dwarf over to his friends with ease before standing over them menacingly.  
"You have heard of Smaug, yes?" He asked in a quiet tone that had the three shifting with fear.  
  
  
"Y-yes-"  
  
  
 **SMACK!**  
  
The force of Bilbo's slap had the dwarf’s head snap to the side.

  
"You will address me as 'Sir'," the hobbit growled. "Am I clear?"  
  
  
"Yes, Sir!" The three cried out with the unharmed one of the group seemingly on the verge of a breakdown.  
  
  
"Good." Bilbo stated, eyeing them coldly, "You may have heard rumours about what happened before Erebor was retaken. What occurred here between me and the dragon, Smaug."  
  
  
The trio nodded fearfully and cringed as Bilbo leaned forward.  
  
  
"I am here to tell you that all the stories you've heard are true."

  
{The deathly silence was not lost on the company. They were watching their burglar in unabashed shock}

  
"You are mere pieces of shit compared to what I have faced." Bilbo continued, his voice eerily rough as he began to circle the criminals predatorily, "I have killed and I will kill again for those I care about."  
  
  
"Please Sir! Have mercy!" The leader whimpered, crawling on his knees.  
  
  
"Perhaps." Bilbo whispered and he glared down at the dwarrow. "If I ever find you fucking with my boy again, there will be no place on Middle earth that will keep you safe from me."  
  
  
The threat had the the trio cower and one unceremoniously wet himself in fear.  
  
"Let this be a lesson to everyone!" Bilbo boomed, his eyes roving over the crowds. "Memorise these faces. Because these are my dwarves!" He declared fiercely. "If you hurt them, bad-mouth them or dishonour them in any way - I _will_ know. And I _will_ find you." The hobbit paused to smirk coldly, "And your remains will never be found."  
  
The issued threat had the entire courtroom standstill in fear staring at the hobbit.  
  
  
" **Am I clear**?"  
  
  
"Yes, Sir!" Was the immediate chorus.  
  
  
Bilbo nodded in satisfaction before glancing at the three criminals who raised their hands above their heads for mercy. "Guards!"  
  
  
The guards snapped to attention at his voice looking at him with newfound respect.  
  
  
"Get these vermin out of my sight." Bilbo said harshly. "Court is dismissed!"   
  
Without further ado, the room cleared as the dwarves hurried to comply with the hobbit's wishes. Once the room was emptied, the hobbit gestured for the guards to leave and they, too, left closing the door after them. With a tired sigh, Bilbo turned and walked past his gaping friends (and one amused wizard) to a seated Ori who was being comforted by his brothers.   
  
"Are you alright?" He asked gently.

Ori remained completely in shock, staring up at the burglar slack-jawed.

_  
This was the burglar they all knew. Gentle, unassuming Bilbo - not the Demon they just witnessed._

  
  
"What was _that_?!" Kili yelped.  
  
  
The hobbit’s mouth twitched as Gandalf chuckled. "That, my lad, was the infamous Took temper."  
  
  
"Oh, shut up." Bilbo huffed, looking more amused than annoyed. But he looked down at Ori concerned. "Are you sure you're alright, Ori? It must've been hard for you these past months."  
  
The dwarrow got to his feet unsteadily and stared at the hobbit before to racing to him. Bilbo took it in stride and wrapped his arms around the trembling figure.

  
"You poor thing," Bilbo murmured, "You must've been terrified."  
  
  
"S-so scared." Ori hiccuped from his chest.  
  
  
"If this should ever occur again, Ori, be sure to tell someone. We're your friends and no one here will think less of you. Alright?" Bilbo murmured soothingly, receiving a nod in turn. "That goes for everyone." He said loudly, placing a hand on a nearby Balin's shoulder. "You are not alone."  
  
He blinked at the sudden tears present in all of the dwarves eyes and without warning, they all converged on him. Ori's face was still pressed into his chest but now several other faces and trembling bodies were pressed into his shoulder, onto his shoulder, into the crook of his neck and against his back accompanied by arms hugging him tightly. The room was filled with their sobs and the hobbit did his best to soothe their tears.  
  


  
{Unbeknownst to Bilbo, Gandalf wiped away tears of his own as he watched the heartfelt scene before him.}

_True courage is about knowing not when to take a life, but when to spare one._

_And if there is one thing dwarves aspire to have, more so than prowess in battle or professional skill...it is to have the reassuring courage of a steadfast friend._ The wizard smiled fondly as his friend patted Thorin and Dwalin’s backs reassuringly before smiling at the others who were wiping the tears away from their faces, _You, my dear Bilbo, are more than just a hobbit._

_You are **you**._

**Author's Note:**

> Tying up loose ends:  
> -Hobbits take friendships seriously. Bilbo is the type to send the 'I-will-kill-you' look if you mess with just one of his friends. (I also had to add in some Liam Neeson stuff haha)
> 
> -Dwarves respect authority (most of the time) which is why they complied to Bilbo's wishes....and plus, our hobbit can be intimidating as fuck when he wants to be. C'mon, this is the legendary hobbit who stood his ground against Smaug the Terrible. The dwarves are all probably thinking...Mahal's balls! Everyone just do as he says!...lol Those criminals never had a chance...
> 
> -Thorin's company broke down because of the toll of all that drama. (Even the King was harassed- just because you wear a crown doesn't really eliminate threats) Sometimes you just need to cry, y'know? And there's nothing wrong with that. 
> 
> -Bilbo is one of those secretly strong types. How else do you think he was able to be knocked out during the battle (pretty hard too, in my opinion) and get back up as if nothing had happened? Also...our company in this story still suffer from the effects of BotFA and may suffer from PTSD. In Bilbo's case, BotFA was his first introduction into so much violence and death and perhaps he's still so high-strung that he's always prepared for a fight now. 
> 
> -Gandalf is Gandalf. He's always had a soft spot for Bilbo. Maybe he knew that Bilbo needed to go on this adventure because he was so keen on staying in the Shire after his parents died.  
> Grief can make you forget how to live and Gandalf didn't want that to happen to his friend. 
> 
> Alrighty, sorry if this was a bit choppy or grammar was weird but I hope you enjoyed this oneshot!


End file.
